"Hello? It's a cow."

Beds is particularly uproarious this month, as I learned this morning when my Dad read me the piece over the phone while I was Assembling Baby Things. (This is chief among my activities these days, second only to Once Again Trying To Get The Baby To Sleep.) He also read me the first chapter of Bleak House, which I read several epochs ago (law school) and he just picked up. (No small feat at 850+ pages. The whole thing, not the first chapter.) Some fabulous potential blawg names and/or tag lines are lurking in there, have at 'em:

"Mountains of costly nonsense"

"Suffer any wrong that can be done you rather than come here!"

"Victim of rash action—brains"